Hello to all. Things continue about the same here. Mark is comfortable, but continues to get weaker. He hasn't eaten in many weeks now and only drinks sips of water. He has started getting dizzy when I roll him side to side in the bed just today. He tried to get a drink of water on his own last night and ended up spilling the water in the bed, so at 4:30am I was up changing the sheets and him. He felt bad, he is just too weak to hold the water glass up. I have continued going in to the office from 9-3:30 or so. Kathy and Brent take care of Mark while I'm gone. It is hard.
Calen had his first rec league basketball game Tuesday night. It was fun to get to watch them play and they had a lot of fun. Their team ended up winning, but really it was all about having fun and hanging out with friends which was nice. I hate that their games are so late. It started at 9. I had to leave Colton's practice to get Colton and Emily in bed and then drive back to watch the second part of Calen's game.
Colton and I had a heart to heart tonight. He is really having a hard time dealing with Mark dying. He cried a lot and just opened up a lot. He's afraid that he won't get to tell Mark goodbye, so I told him that each day he needs to go talk to his dad in the morning and tell him what he needs to tell him for the day even if Mark's eyes aren't open that Mark hears him. I think that will help Colton to feel that he can say goodbye. I talked to Colton about Mark's wishes to stay at home and I think Colton is okay with that. It's really hitting him hard and I pray that I handle this in the right way. It's so hard for all of us.
I am so sleep deprived and yet I find myself staying up half the night. It's crazy I know. I think my brain is turning into mush. ha
Thanks to all the Slammers families for the Tuesday night dinners. You have been wonderful to feed us every Tuesday night. Thank you all so much.
Thanks to all of you who continue to pray for us. Please continue to keep Mark in your prayers. Pray for all those fighting cancer. God bless!!!!
4 comments:
It must be terrible saying goodbye for the kids. They probably don't yet have the faith that it is only for a while. - all they know is that the rock of their lives will be gone in a while.
Because of his cancer, We knew for some time that our Son's time was limited. And yet, his final days came upon us almost without warning - on Friday morning he was looking forward to checking out of the hospitalt; by friday evening he had lost use of his right side and much of his speech. Saturday he lost consciousness and early Monday he was gone. SO, while we'd talked much about god and heaven, there was yet much unsaid, and many hugs and laughs that we still needed to have.
While you've had to deal with the final days for far longer than us, you've had the blessings of Mark being able to spend a few more days with his kids (and then a few more yet - he is one tough son of a gun).
Those extra days will mean a lot. You've told your kids righly so that they must say their goodbyes every day, And on many days (all but one), they'll come back to see that they get one more time with their dad. What a gift.
I;ve heard Mark talk about his kids many times at confeences (in between picking on me for one thing or another). I have no doubt they know just how much they mean to him.
You're in my prayers - all of you, as always
May the God of Peace comfort your hearts, souls, minds, and Mark's body. Continuing to pray for each of you.
The Nichols family,
Ben, Sydney & Hope
Ronda,
I think you are handling this all beautifully, and Mark and your kids are truly lucky to have you.
Tina
Ronda,
Thank goodness for your strong family bond and your tremendous faith. Your blogs are a wonderful testimony for everyone.
I don't have words to express my sorrow for your family. My father passed away very suddenly while he was on vacation at age 50 and I remember the pain and loss that followed. The lack of opportunity to say goodbye has always been in the back of my mind. You gave sage advice to Colton when you told him to say what he needed to say to Mark every AM. Truly a lesson ALL of us could take from your blog. We take so much for granted, especially our family and friends.
May Mark be as pain free as possible and may all of you be strong and courageous. You have all fought the brave fight and left nothing unsaid. For that I am thankful for you. Each and every one of you has "the heart of a lion".
Praying for you and your family and keeping you in our thoughts and in our hearts. Sherry on behalf of the Golsons
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