Dec 8

Hello to everyone. I want to thank everyone for the wonderful birthday cards, wishes, gifts, food, flowers. It was overwhelming and awesome. I was totally surprised and felt so loved by so many of you. I woke to my house being decorated with "40" stuff everywhere and then my front yard was filled with cows and a sign "Holy Cow Ronda's 40" thanks to Debbie Brooks and Stacey Brandon, I hear. Mark wanted to make the day special for me and he got up out of bed several times. He took a couple of pictures with the family which was great. I think he was totally worn out and slept the entire day after my birthday. I felt guilty about that.

Angie, Matt's wife, flew into Birmingham the evening of my birthday and stayed until this morning and flew back to Oklahoma City. It was nice to see her and I think Matt has been missing her a lot. He has been here since before Thanksgiving. Eugenie, Mark's sister is in from Austin, TX now as well. Mark's parents have been here since Sept with the exception of a 2 week break they took when my mom visited. They are troopers.

The Hospice nurse was out to visit Mark on Monday. He is stable. He doesn't get out of bed for much of anything and is very weak. He eats very little if anything and our goal is to keep him out of pain. So far, he seems to stay pretty comfortable for the most part. He occasionally will hurt and not take his medicine like he should. He is still stubborn about things. The Hospice team has a child psychologist that is supposed to visit with each of the kids weekly. She is a very nice lady and Colton and Emily are fine with this, but Calen totally freaked out about it. He started yelling and crying and does NOT want to see her. He was very opposed to this on both occasions that I discussed it with him. I talked with Mark about it tonight and he thinks we should just not make him see her for now. I guess he is right. I just worry about Calen. He holds a lot in and seems to be withdrawn a lot. He doesn't do much with his friends like he has in years past. He told me he didn't want to see her at school because that was the only place he could be "normal" and maybe it is where he escapes from all of this. I also wonder if he is afraid he will break down at school. I will try to call them tomorrow before they make it to the Jr High and talk with her. I think he will need it eventually, but I don't want him to feel pressure.

I went back to work today after being off for the last few weeks since starting on Hospice. It was very hard for me. I feel like I should be home with Mark, but I can't be off forever either. It is a difficult decision. I only got to see Mark for a little bit the entire day since I had to take Colton to basketball practice when I got home from work, then get Emily into bed, read books with her and then read with Colton for 20 minutes. It eats up all of your time and before you know it, it's almost midnight.

We continue to pray for Mark and ask for strength to get us through what is to come. Please remember Mark in your prayers as always. God bless!!!!!